In 2025-6, Boardwalk Theatre Presents the World Premiere of Jeff Hughes’ The Poor Don’t Play Croquet

The Poor Don't Play Croquet by Jeff Hughes

Set in a rundown tenement in Bayonne, New Jersey, Croquet tells the story of Eddie “the Pope” Maslanka and his wife Marina, young parents struggling with dead end jobs and rats in their walls. Refusing to succumb to their economic situation, they remain fueled by their belief in a brighter tomorrow, passion for one another, and their shared love for their talented son. 

All they need is a break. 

But what happens when they actually catch one? 

The Poor Don’t Play Croquet is comedy about our dreams, even when our only dream is survival. 

“When I see you, when I look at you, I don’t wanna just hug you. I wanna smother you. I want you to die in my arms. Is that fucked up? I don’t wanna wrap myself around you. I was to submerge myself into you. Inside your skin. I want you to feel that you and me are the same thing and that we got the same blood and that blood is boiling red fucking hot. I want to breathe you. I think, no. What I want is for you to breathe me. I want to give you life the same way you give me a hard on every time you walk out the shower with your hair all wet. I don’t know if that’s regular love but it’s my love…for you.”

-Eddie “the Pope” Maslanka